June the 19th of 1987

It’s been a while since I spent even 30 minutes on my blog, work has been crazy and my current work station isn’t doing me any justice. Life has been a little crazy lately, love life on levels beyond amazing, friendships slowly being mended, wounds slowly covering, ego feeling a little less bruised, scars still telling tales of struggle, encounters and change and family still as they were, my family. Haven’t decided about whether I should be excited about my birthday next week, so much has happened in the last year and celebrations of any sort feels like I will be betraying myself. I as “Emo” as I will sound believe that I am greater in pain, wiser and more open to life’s lessons and happiness really has never been a feeling I boast about and giving her attention now is betraying my norms. Strangely I think about next week Tuesday and smile, I have come far, bruised and battered by life and all its lessons that are shitty at times but I am now wrapped in success stories, I bear witness to the greater side of life in all ways spiritual and otherwise.  I agree to have been fully submerged in all things dark once upon a time but it is in all those fucked up times that I have been introduced and re-introduced to my true identity and I know more of myself now that I did 5 years ago. So maybe my 25th birthday is worth celebrating, not because I am there yet in terms of success ladder or personal life, I know I am not yet there but I have borne witness to times destined to do me in and came out a warrior. I am looking forward to the Sms’s, phone calls, Facebook texts and of course personal visits from the people I truly love. It feels like it is going to be a great one and maybe I am excited and maybe I am looking forward to it.