I run from myself while bumping into myself, involuntarily I stop and stare adorning the scars life left on my face
I try to find words bombastic like those of Shaggy so I could earn the title of a poet
I sprint to loneliness when words bombastic flee from me telling me I'm a simple being
Words so simple yet complex and tormenting visit my mind and I lose myself to them
I become cutter, cutting myself with a razor of words, , I diligently cover the wounds from the eye of the world
I in simplicity seek to find words bombastic so I can professionally bring to light the intensity of the pain I once felt
I feel pregnant with words yet I don't know the father
I grow pimples of words on my face I'm starting to show, the elders will start to question
I vomit words so simple yet bombastic and pained, my mother can't swallow
Asking me who impregnated me with such lessons, she seeks to end the perpetrator’s life
Wishing I was a barren and had let those words remain in me -unshared, but it's too late the elders already know
I run to my corner of happiness called misery I question my foolishness, wishing I had aborted this thing, , pain had no mercy, it sure wasn’t gonna be treated as human so it became the thing unnamed
I should have, could have, would have, define this moment of my sitting on my vomit
I scream I wasn't ready, my mother has turned deaf
I cry, words raped me, yet no one will catch a case
I heavy with words, close to delivery, try to find the father
The father was a she and she already had a home, she called me a home wrecker
While she feasted on me, taking my innocence, she paid no regard to her responsibility
time came, I was alone, I delivered a boy
I named my boy words and he gave birth to a new me
A soul so pure, I see a glimpse of paradise, I decide to keep him
I run to my corner, hoping to one day earn the title of a poet, and thank the heavens for this revelation
©S Phohleli 2012-03-23